Monthly Archives: October 2009

WNBA is Doin Work

Sweet layup!

Sweet layup!

The WNBA released their ratings for the playoffs, and shockingly did better than they ever have. I’ve never been a fan of watching them shoot jumpers and layups, but apparently it’s caught on enough to average nearly half a million viewers during the playoffs on ESPN2. Good work WNBA, maybe one day you’ll have a full city’s worth of people watching the finals! I don’t know one person who follows the WNBA, and don’t think I’ll meet one anytime soon. It’s crazy there’s all this positivity about the league, but most of their stadiums are emptier than Oakland A’s games. I bet TMZ gets 500K viewers a night. One thing I can’t deny is that they’d probably school me on the court, but Americans only want to watch the best, and THAT is another reason we aren’t all that excited about soccer.


I Guess it’s Time For SJax to Go…

Steven Jackson WarriorsWell, since I’ve been following SJax from the start of his trade demands on DIME magazine, I guess I can finally admit he’s burned his bridges for dubs fans. We’ve been very tolerant of Jackson in the sense that he’s always played hard, and been a great leader on the court. I thought he’d actually show a little more respect to the organization that’s stood by him when many others wouldn’t. I guess even he is wearing out his welcome. It’s been hard for me to admit that Jackson is a cancer to the team, but this weekends events have shown me the light. I didn’t actually see his preseason game that earned him a two game suspension, but it sounded like a bitch move. Seriously, if you don’t want to play you don’t need to pick up five personal and one technical foul to prove it. He already made his point by demanding a trade, so why pour it on. I feel like the Warriors have pretty much done everything an organization can do for him. They’ve overpaid him, and pretty much handed this young roster over to him to lead. I guess that’s not enough , and I understand he’s frustrated, but he’s going about it the wrong way. The most amazing part to me is Artest now seems like the guy who has matured since the infamous Detriot slugfest. Artest has made slightly sane maneuvers (aside from not knowing that San Diego existed), but he didn’t take a ridiculously large contract like Jackson did, and now he’s playing with the champs. If Jackson really thought it through, he should’ve stuck with that old contract that was slightly more tradable. Now he’s just overpaid, spoiled, and selfish, which can only be traded to teams like the Clippers and Grizzleys of the world. It’s scary that all this is just starting to come clear to me. I’m not even caring what we get at this point even if it’s Zydrunas Ilgauskas’s dead corpse. He’s pretty much made his trade value lower than the Raiders franchise hopes. I’d like to see a deal done before the season starts, so his attitude doesn’t spread to the few positives we have going into the year.


Freestyle Walker Gets Owned

Well, I’ve always thought freestyle walking was one of the lamest sports ever invented, especially when they came out with the shoes that the little plastic pieces on the bottom to allow you to slide down rails. I’m not sure if this guy IS in fact freestyle walking, but he REALLY needs to get a little more practice in!


Alligator Rips Golfer’s ARM Off

Beaufort, South Carolina – Officials say an alligator bit off part of a golfer’s arm as he leaned over to pick up his ball at a private South Carolina course.

The man, who is in his 70s, was retrieving his ball from a pond when the 10-foot alligator bit him at Ocean Creek Golf Course in Beaufort County. The gator pulled the golfer into the pond and ripped off his arm in the struggle. His golf partners were able to free him.

Wow!  That’s a pretty gripping account!  I mean, Chubbs made golf course alligator attacks famous when he lost his hand, but this guy really one upped him.  Getting pulled into the pond and having his arm ripped off?  That’s really raising the bar.


Doin Lines Week 5

Football Field SidelineIt looks like we are starting to be able to tell between the contenders and the pretenders are already. The games actually seem much easier to pick than the past couple years. Even though last week was a little disappointing for my standards (2-3), but I wasn’t overly confident in very many games going into the week, which is why I probably only picked 5 games. Green Bay killed me when they went for the FG while down two scores. Why didn’t they go for a TD to cover that spread! I guess that should be no excuse, I expect better from myself! I’m still 16-7 on the season, so I have a little leeway at the moment in terms of a winning record on the season. I can honestly say I felt different last week watching the games, and suddenly realized that JaMarcus has single-handedly overthrown any hopes I had left that the Raiders could be competitive from week to week. Sure they might show up every third week and give someone a close game possibly even winning a couple, but in my eyes, the “caring” about the outcomes part of this season, is over. It’s scary that I was more excited about a pre-season Warriors game than my Raiders game in week 5! This should be good news from a betting perspective though! I’ll have minimal emotion attached to my picks. Here are my non-emotional LOCKS for week 5, and same as always, the home teams are in bold.

This should be on Mullet Galore's Homepage

This should be on Mullet Galore's Homepage.

Minnesota (-10) Over St. Louis

These teams are polar opposites of each other. I’m no fan of the Favre 24 hour network, but this team is very good, and can’t afford to take anyone lightly. It doesn’t seem like a team that would either. The Vikes and Rams records are mirror images of each other, literally (5-0, 0-5) I can’t write a backwards five but you get the idea. The Vikings are already the media’s darlings that are Super Bowl bound, and I have a hard time being convinced that they will let up this week. I actually can’t believe this spread isn’t over 14! Adrian Peterson should have a much better game compared to last weeks very un-AP like performance. The 49ers skunked the Rams last week 35-0, and I see this one ending close to that same score. This might be the easiest pick of the week. I’m more curious if Jared Allen is going to bring back that mullet! His hair looks long enough to do it again, bring it back Jared!

Buffalo (-6) Over Cleveland

Buffalo has been a little disappointing this season as I didn’t expect that heartbreaking opener to linger this long, but they’re not nearly as disappointing as the Browns. The Bills only have one way to go, and that’s up. They’re much too talented of a team to play this poorly as they showed last season that they were at least a team that could string together a few wins. I see them getting their swagger back against a scarily bad Browns team.

I’m not sure if Cleveland got worse because they made a terrible TV show on Fox with their town’s name, but they’re already looking to the future, and seem to have conceded this season. They already traded away Braylon this week, and seemed to get what they needed in some draft picks in the future. There is only one way I could possibly see the Browns being competitive in this one, which would have to include one spectacular game from Cribbs running some kicks back. That’s not all that likely since their defense doesn’t seem to like making the other team punt.

I doubt Patrick Willis is questioning much Singletary has to say on improvements to his game.

I doubt Patrick Willis is questioning much Singletary has to say on improvements to his game.

San Francisco (-2.5) Over Atlanta

Apparently the 49ers are more and more like Mike Singletary with each passing week. He seems to have the whole team believing in themselves, which can never be underestimated. They’re probably the least publicized 3-1 team that can only get better in four or five weeks when Crabtree gets all situated. If it wasn’t for that lucky/heroic Favre throw, they could be undefeated! They’ve covered or beat the spread for me every week this season, so this is no time to give up on them now with less than a field goal! Atlanta might be better than they’ve played so far, but their offense hasn’t been in sync all season. They are coming off a bye week, but I don’t see it being easy against a solid San Francisco defense. We might have to off on Michael Turner’s breakout week. Starter Shaun Hill is a surprising 7-0 at home for the 49ers which makes me more confident in this pick, and Vernon Davis is finally relevant in San Francisco. They have something amidst the foggy bay in an otherwise dead NFC West.

Carolina (-3.5) Over Washington

I’m not big on Carolina this year, and it’s pretty hard for me to pick this one since Delhomme gets booed as much as JaMarcus at home games. He’ll just have to hope their running game can help him cure his turnover habit he’s developed lately. They have a good O-Line, so I don’t see why they aren’t running more, oh yeah, they’re usually behind. I’m kind of picking them because I just have a hard time convincing myself that they aren’t a good team. They just had their bye week, so I’m sure they had plenty of time to prep for a crappy Redskins team. Also, there wasn’t any reports of Steve Smith punching a teamate, so that has to be a plus! The Skins have won two games, but they close games against the Rams and Bucs. One of their losses came to the Lions, so really the Redskins should have a winning record with the opponents they’ve faced so far. They just changed offensive coordinators, which is always a good sign for a team during the season. I see Carolina taking their frustrations out this week on a awful Washington team.

Wes Welker diving TD

Wes is more!

New England (-3) Over Denver

Much has been made over the Broncos sparkling record of 3-0, but I’m still not a believer. They’re much hyped defense hasn’t really faced anyone with a reputable offense. I wouldn’t even really count Dallas as a great offense at this point. I don’t know what it is, but I just can’t take the Broncos too serious yet. I think the Patriots are going to be their first real test. I thought Brady has looked like he’s coming back to his old form, and with Wes Welker being inserted back into the lineup we may see the offensive fireworks once again. Moss will be able to stop running the short routes and head upfield again! I see them getting rolling on offense again. I think Orton will have to prove himself this week as the Pats run defense is pretty solid. He’s got some playmakers in the wide receiver corp, but will he have enough time to find them against the new Patriots blitzing style defense?

Jacksonville (+1.5) Over Seattle

Don’t ask me why I’m breaking my golden rule of not betting on two crappy teams, because I don’t think I really have that answer at the moment. I guess I just have to pick the Jags, because they really took it to the Titans last week, and showed that that can be a good team at times. The Seahawks may or may not have Hasselbeck in at QB, but at this point does it really matter? Their whole offensive line is hurt, so even if he is in there with hurt ribs, I don’t see him being in there for too long. They honestly need to show me some sign of life against a team not named the Rams for me to pick them at any point this season. If Garrard had anyone besides MJD to pass to, I’d probably parlay this pick with the Minnesota game.

Maybe having the same QB every week can make him keep the balls from falling to the ground

Maybe having the same QB every week can make him keep the balls from falling to the ground.

New York Jets (-1.5) Over Miami

The big question in this game is: can the wild cat beat the 4th ranked defense in the league? The Rexecutioners have allowed the fewest yards in the league, and held the Madden style Saints to 10 points if it weren’t for Sanchez’s two mistakes this would have been a very close game. Sanchez will have to shoulder the offensive load with his new buddy Braylon, and critics are eager to see if he can bounce back from a bad start in Hispanic Heritage Month. The Jets have won their last three games in Miami, so I don’t see history changing now that Miami is in the Chad Henne phase of the franchise.


Legalize It: Smoking Cigars on SF Courses

Not everyone looks good in floppy hats

Not everyone looks good in floppy hats

For a large percentage of the folks who enjoy the sport, smoking cigars and playing golf go hand-in-hand.  You’ll see guys lighting up a stogie in good weather and in bad, during a good round and through the shanks.  And it seems as though the wealthier the golfer, the more abundant the cigars. 

Which brings me to our subject today, the Honorary Assistant Captain of the US President’s Cup Team, Michael Jeffrey Jordan, “His Airness”.  This weekend the 8th President’s Cup will be hosted at Harding Park in San Francisco, pitting a talented US Team versus an International Team comprised of the top twelve players in the world outside of the US and continental Europe.  Harding Park is a municipal course owned by the Parks and Recreations of San Francisco, and hosting a tournament of this magnitude is a tremendous and distinct honor.  And for Jordan being selected an Honorary assistant to Captain Fred Couples is another great perk for the basketball legend and celebrity. 

Jordan spotted preparing for his role as Honorary Asst. Captain... in Cabo!

Jordan spotted preparing for his role as Honorary Assistant Captain... in Cabo!

Along with being a course of the people comes the laws of the people, specifically health ordinances recently put into play.  Little known fact: San Francisco banned the smoking of cigars (and cigarettes of course) as part of a city-wide ordinance to keep the city parks smoke-free.  And Harding is certainly near the top of the list in terms of kept up Parks in the city.  I’ll also vouch for beautifully kept Fleming, the nine-hole executive course located on the same property between Harding’s front and back nine.

Honorary Assistant Captain Jordan was spotted on Tuesday at Harding in a practice round with a very large stogie simmering away.  Heck we have the pictures to prove it.  Only problem is, if the city wanted to prosecute, the most they could do is send him a ticket for a measly $100.  One would guess Jordan could pay the fine with one of the benjamins he uses to light a new cigar, but he doesn’t, he uses old thousand dollar bills and would have to ask for change.

His Airness after he heard about the $100 fine
His Airness after he heard about the $100 fine

So the debate rages on: Should Jordan obey the order from the city or should he ignore it for this special occasion?  He was asked about the topic and responded by saying he knew it was wrong but thought he could slide by in this situation.  Asked in an interview by PGATour.com how many cigars he would smoke during the week, “I would say (it’s) a three-cigar round. I would try to keep it at a minimum of three.”  That’s right, a MINIMUM of three per day.

After further review, I think the city should uphold its ordinance in this situation, and follow Jordan around the course all week.  If/when he smokes three per day, over the next 5 days, send him 15 tickets at $100 a pop.  For a guy like Jordan this is tip money at most, and in a city like San Francisco his money is more than welcome.  Whether or not I agree with the ordiannce is a different story, but the law is the law!  Reflecting back on his recent Hall of Fame induction speech, Jordan’s not the only one who can leave a bad taste in someone’s mouth…


The MLB Playoffs on TBS!

TBS PostseasonThe MLB Divisional Series was kicked off today, and the most exciting game TBS has covered so far was the last game of the regular season. Not to say if your a Philly (won 5-1) or Yankee (won 7-2) fan it wasn’t a good day, but it just wasn’t all that exciting for the rest of us. The Dodgers game is the only one that’s been interesting so far. The Dodgers are currently up 3-2 going into the bottom of the 5th and are surprisingly ripping Carpenter. So this game could be promising! Watching the playoffs and the amazing last game of the regular season it has made me realize I just don’t enjoy any announcer combos baseball has to offer. Maybe they’re dumbing it down too much for the people who don’t know what’s going on, but I rarely hear anything remotely insightful. Maybe they use the sideline reporters too much, I think Craig Sager always scares me a little the first time I see him everynight. He gives me that hide your kids because I don’t know about this guy vibe, but at least we don’t have to hear them more than five or six times a game. One thing I’m a HUGE fan of TBS for having, is the pitch-by-pitch K zone up they throw in the corner for every batter. It almost makes up for the weak announcing crews that are scared to make anyone sound like a bad person. I’d love to hear them call guys out, and stop playing the soft story line. We need some more Charles Barkley’s on the air!

You can vote for more than one combo of announcers if you really think they are equally good… Is that even possible?


Is This Really Necessary?

I’m sitting here at my desk at work going nuts listening the Tigers-Twins game… what could be better?!  Oh yeah, watching the game at home on TV with a beer.  Why does the one game tiebreaker always have to be a day game?  I get it… the winning team needs time to travel.  But seriously, they know they’re going to New York, and the NL playoffs are both scheduled for tomorrow already.  SO, why not let this be a night game?  I mean, think about it, even the East Coast had to miss the beginning of the game.  There’s no reason this game should be played where only a fraction of fans can watch.  Now that this one-game playoff tiebreaker is an every year thing, perhaps it’s time MLB took a look at how to best capitalize on this.  Now, back to AM radio I go!


We Get It: Favre = God

Brett Favre gunslinger

Last night was another memorable Favre performance, but if you were only listening to the ESPN crew (Jaworski, Tirico, and Gruden) you may have thought Brett Favre was playing one on one with himself vs. his younger self in Minnesota. They brought out the full archives of Favre to show us that he was in fact once young. They talked like they’d leave their wives for him if he asked. ESPN’s bromance with Favre has reached a new level that I didn’t think could happen. Even on crucial plays for the Packers they’d still cut to Favre for a sideline shot. It was very important to show him kneeling on his “legendary knee” or scratching his “legendary stubbles.” All of the over hype made me actually hate the Vikings by the end of the game. I didn’t care all that much who won going into the game hoping to see a close divisional rivalry play out, but the bromance with Favre has made me into a Minnesota hater. Sure he was having a good game, I can’t deny that, but the Packers D was giving him 30 seconds to throw each time he dropped back. If any quarterback has that much time to sit there and look at every receiver he better find the open one. Hell, you could put JaMarcus’s corpse of a QB body back there, and probably put up 300 yards with that O-line performance last night! I wish Aaron Rodgers pulled a Tonya Harding on him when he was wishy washy on his first retirement, so we wouldn’t have to keep hearing about him. I guess we’ll just have to hope the Vikings ship sinks as fast as the Jets did last year, so the Favre bromance can end once and for all.


Explicit Cheerleading Routine Drives Old People Nuts

Wow, old people just keep getting older.  I’m no kid myself, but I’m siding with the teenage girls on this one.  When I saw all the hullabaloo about this “racy” number, I knew it’d be blown out of proportion.  BUT, this was even tamer than I expected!  I feel like I wasted 3 minutes of my life, but who knows, maybe it will do something for you. 

Sorry for the overly ambitious title, but c’mon, that’s how the news web sites get clicks!  Would you have clicked on this had it said “5 white girls and an Asian dance out of sync”?  Really?  Hmm, maybe I would too.

UPDATE:  Damn, these uptight soccer moms are relentless!  Embedding was disabled, so you’ll have to go to the source.


Miguel Cabrera – And the Depressing 911 Call

Miguel Cabrera bruised faceBy now you’ve most likely heard about Miguel Cabrera’s domestic altercation over the weekend…Which resulted in him showing up to the ballpark with a large and very visible scratch across his face. Now, the focus of the story will shift to Tuesday, and whether he plays in the Tigers biggest game of the year against the Twins. Jim Leyland and the Tigers are clearly in a no win situation either way they play it.

http://apps.detnews.com/apps/multimedia/player/index.php?id=3843

The audio is depressing.

Will also be siding with Paul Morosi on this story as well.

http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/story/10172076/For-Cabrera,-one-bad-scratch-deserves-another


Sometimes you have to play 163!

Twins Tigers Inge

The Tigers could be struggling at the wrong time!

Somehow the Tigers have found themselves in a tie atop the AL Central after a mild implosion coupled with a red hot Twins team. This marks the third straight year that we will have a pre-playoff playoff game. This will be the Twins second consecutive year that they are playing in a tiebreaker game as they lost last season to the White Sox. The game will be held Tuesday in the Metrodome in it’s second farewell to the regular season. As today was supposed to be the last game played there, and 51,000 showed up to show their support of a great longtime stadium. Now they have one more game with the winner advancing to the ALDS ti face the Yankees. The Twins own the regular season head to head tie breaker between the two clubs, and have the right to home field advantage. The starters for the game will be rookie Rick Porcello (14-9, 4.04) for the Tigers, and Scott Baker (15-9 4.36) will be tossing for the Twins. I think this is the first time I’ve been even mildly excited about the MLB playoffs so far, mainly because whoever comes out of this game as the winner, I’ll likely be forced into rooting for them take the AL Championship.

It’s been quite an amazing run for the Twins since former MVP, Justin Morneau, went down for the season. They’ve picked up their game and have gone 16-4 in their last twenty games to give themselves one final chance to get in.

Home hankies will be in full effect Tuesday!

Home hankies will be in full effect Tuesday!

They’ve been getting contributions from everyone including decent pitching (not the middle relief) but overall effective, and some very timely hitting. Delmon Young hasn’t been a stranger to receiving  standing ovations  at the Metrodome lately. He has been coming up with clutch RBI’s in a lot of games, which is very reminiscent of  the way BJ Upton heated up for Tampa Bay in their playoff run last season. Joe Mauer has been quiet for his standards, but it’s mainly due to getting pitched around and walked more often. With this type of playoff push I hope this convinces MVP voters that Mauer is the obvious choice over Derek (I get way too much media hype) Jeter. When you look at the playoff matchups on paper, I think the Tigers would have a better chance of taking down the Yankees lineup wise, but the Twins are white label hot right now so it seems like you can never count a team on a roll out. As Billy Beane once said “It’s a crapshoot once you get in the playoffs, you just have to get there first!”

I’m predicting the Twins to win 5-4, and advance to play the Yankees.


Second Edition – Top Ten Chuck Norris Jokes:

catchucknorriskick10 ) Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

9 ) Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.

8 ) Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

7 ) When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

6 ) Chuck Norris doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks one pin down and the other nine faint.

chuck-norris-own-country5 ) Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

4 ) Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

3 ) Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay’s potato chip.

2 ) Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

1 ) There is in fact an “I” in Norris, but there is no “team”… not even close.


Coaches Gone Wild, Part IV : Charity Receives “Pearl of Wisdom”

I can't do KKK jokes? But I have so many!!

I can't do KKK jokes? But I have so many!!

09-24-09 – In the final installment of “Coaches Gone Wild”, we’re treated to a true ‘Pearl of Wisdom”.  If Bruce Pearl thought his job was tough before throwing around race jokes at charity events, the next few months should prove to be several times worse.  Pearl, the head men’s basketball coach at the University of Tennessee, was one of the featured speakers at a kickoff for charity fundraiser among Tennessee Valley Authority employees.  He took questions from the crowd, and one person asked him about his three new players this year. Part of his response was as follows:

“I’ve got a tough job. I’ve got to put these guys from different worlds together, right? I’ve got guys from Chicago, Detroit. I’m talking about the hood! And I’ve got guys from Grainger County, where they wear the hood!” Pearl said. After a pause, he added, “That wasn’t part of the script.”

  

Bruce Pearl: The V is for Volatile

Bruce Pearl: The V is for Volatile

The Apology:

“This morning while speaking at a private kick-off event for a great organization that benefits many local charities, I made a statement in jest to describe the diverse group our staff recruits year-in and year-out.

“Unfortunately while I was trying to excite the crowd and encourage employees to give, I made an inappropriate joke. I certainly did not intend to offend anyone and I apologize to everyone, especially the people of Grainger County.

“In no way am I trying to justify what I said, but I’m disappointed that the focus has been placed on me rather than the charities I was there to help. My only hope is that the visibility of this mistake will encourage those who can to give to those in need during these difficult times.”

Can you tell which one had to where a costume to look like a dog?

Can you tell which one had to where a costume to look like a dog?

The man is charismatic, there’s no denying that, as evidenced in the photo where he painted a “V” on his chest in support of the Lady Vols.  He’s a great motivator and speaker, apparently knowing his audience there in Tennessee to a fault.  Even the folks from the county to which Pearl refers, Grainger, didn’t have a problem with the comment and laughed it off, saying they understood it to be a joke.  That’s fine, I guess, but what about the kids he referred to from “the hood”?  So far we haven’t heard from them, and I doubt we will, but I’m curious to know what they think.

After further review, Bruce Pearl seems to be getting a free pass and that really worries me.  It shouldn’t be ok for a coach to slip up and draw race cards to excite the crowd.  The fact that the crowd enabled the joke to succeed, at a charity event, is pretty scary as well… but that’s a different story for a different day.  I just hope Bruce Pearl can think of better ways in the future of getting his audience to donate to charity.


LeGarrette Blount: Back to Work

Last night, The Oregonian reported that Mike Belotti and Chip Kelly are considering reinstating RB LeGarrette Blount

The question is….

Is anyone surprised?