March 25, 2011

What Would Tebow Do?

By By

I know this is a bit old, and my intentions was to get this post up during the end of the 2010 NFL Season, but things happened, and I delayed the post.  Seeing as to how I’ve had the longest episode of Writer’s Block in the history of my blogging existence, I figured why not just post my past thoughts in the mean time?  So here is WWTD Pt. 2, hope you enjoy!

Randy Moss
Randy Moss is no stranger to controversy, but it was his public dispute with a blue-collar kind of guy who owned a buffet restaurant that created a media frenzy, ultimately contributing to his being cut by the Vikings.  According to the owner, Moss stated his food wasn’t to the standards of what Moss fed his dogs.  It seems as if someone could use some God in his life.
What would Tebow do?
While Tim Tebow is not susceptible to disliking one’s cuisine, what he would have done was use God’s will to turn a negative into a positive.  He would tell the owner he was feeling charitable, then box up the spread and send it to a third world country to feed the poverty-stricken children.  When asked how he would be paying for it, he’d reply, “Straight God homie.”
Brett Favre
Brett Favre has acted like a little girl about his retirement for the past three or four years, so it’s fitting that he and his career won’t ride off into the sunset, because of a girl.  Obviously “sexting” can be inappropriate, especially in the alleged manner in which Favre was doing it, but who’s to say he wasn’t led on by his accuser?  I’m sure a Jenn Sterger reality show isn’t far off in the making.
What would Tebow do?
It’s difficult for any man to avoid temptation and sin, especially when your profession surrounds you with beautiful women who are eyeing your seven or eight figure salary.  But to preserve his purity and commitment to the Lord, Tim Tebow would go to extreme measures, including fixing himself up with a Friar doo.  What better way to detract women from you, than by becoming hideous and creepy?  Now excuse me, I have a Davinci painting to dispose of.

11 Comments | posted in Sports

March 23, 2011

The Government Needs to Move On….

By chappy81

I’ve tried to avoid watching/paying attention to any of the Bonds perjury case, but low and behold we are subjected to updates regularly on ESPN, so there’s no way to avoid noticing what’s going on with it. I don’t think it really matters what the outcome of the trial is. If he’s convicted eight years after his testimony for what he said he didn’t knowingly do, will that really send a message to the MLB or current players? Proving he was a liar in court and trying to make him the poster boy for the steroid era earns a big, whoopitte-de-do-da since there were so many guys taking PED’s. Many fans are still calling Henry Aaron the home run king whether it was the PED’s or the difference in the way the two men carried themselves. We all know Barry isn’t exactly the perfect human or really that nice of a guy in general, but does the ruling in this trial make any kind of difference? I think we can all agree Barry took some type of PED’s (outside a Giants fan or two), and if he didn’t take steroids, then Jimmer is an All-American defender. If Bonds ends up in jail, would I argue? Doubtful. If he gets off with nothing happening, I can see myself caring to the extent of a serious exhale and shoulder shrug combo. I think the public court of opinion is all that matters to him or baseball fans.His legacy amongst baseball fans and HOF voters is more important than the outcome of this trial, which makes me feel that this is a giant waste of time and money for our court system.

This guy doesn't believe Barry would take PED's!

While watching an update yesterday on how the jury selection was going I couldn’t help but think of an article I read in Rolling Stone Magazine a week or two ago on the financial collapse a few short years ago. The article was talking about the executives for AIG, Bank of America, Goldman Sachs, Lehman Brothers, JP Morgan Chase, etc., and how nobody went to jail! I’m far from an expert on what happened during that collapse, but I know that those executives that were pulling in billions of dollars out of their companies for themselves, set our economy back as much as the tsunami/earthquake will in Japan, yet one person (Bernie Madoff) is the only one that went to jail. Here’s the article if you’re interested, it’s a pretty solid idiots guide for the financial collapse for people like myself that didn’t quite understand everything that went down. The executives paid minimal fines for these egregious crimes, and the government bailed them out in the end. How is that justice!?! It’s not, and there never really will be as long as those execs have the money to hand over to people deciding their fate. For some reason instead of the government spending the time and effort to chase down the guys that ruined our economy four years ago, they’ve spent the past eight years forming what sounds like a very beatable perjury case against one of baseball’s most hated super stars. Really boggles the mind…

Bonds may have lied to a grand jury, but you could argue that nearly every other player lied as well in their testimonies, yet they still go after Bonds because nobody likes him. I don’t condone lying in federal court, but it feels like there’s about a million other things they should be worrying about. I’m guessing they  hate the guy like much of America does, so they are trying to prove some lame point. Maybe that’s why they seem care about Clemens as well, because he’s a big name that is a jackass. The Clemens case seems a little more solid than the one against Bonds, after he keeps changing his statements, so why not drop the weak case and carry on with the solid one if your trying to make some kind of example out of a baseball superstar. I guess the theme for this post is caring or not caring in this instance. Why should anyone care as much as the government does about whether Bonds lied or not. Why do we care more about Bonds putting a needle in his ass more than we care about executives tearing apart the country’s economy? Probably because our country as a whole reminds me of a functioning addict.

14 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , | posted in Sports

March 20, 2011

We’ve Got To Put Up With This Now?

By mceezy

Just when it looked like the USF Dons were making their move back into the WCC’s elite, the elite is getting eliter. Gonzaga looked like they had all but fallen from the perch they’ve owned for a decade now, and I even proclaimed that they had – prematurely. St. Mary’s took a big step back this year when they failed to make the NCAA tournament, and subsequently got ousted in the first round of the NIT by Kent State. Though USF has been making strong run to the Elite 8 of the prestigious CIT, surprisingly my attention was squarely focused on the Gonzaga-BYU game yesterday in Denver.

After Gonzaga turned their season around and won the WCC tournament, they dominated St. John’s and looked poised to make another cinderella run in the tournament. But then they ran into BYU. After a pretty close first half, the Cougars steamrolled the Zags and disposed of them 89-67. The scary part is, BYU is coming to the West Coast Conference next season. Gonzaga has ruled the conference for the last 11 years, and BYU has just squashed them like they were nothing. Part of me finds relief in the fact that Jimmer Fredette won’t be around next year, but another part of me knows that Brigham Young is a perennial 20-win team with 8 NCAA Tournament appearances in the last 10 or 11 years. Despite CIT wins over Idaho and Hawaii, the Dons suddenly move down to the fourth best team in the WCC next season. It’s gonna be lot harder to get back into the NCAA tourney for the first time since 98…..

3 Comments   |  tags: , , | posted in Sports

March 18, 2011

Goodbye Arco

By mceezy

Tonight should be an interesting night. I’ll likely be paying my last visit to a building I practically grew up in. From the first year the Kings played in Sacramento in 1985 through 1998, I paid about 20 visits a year to Arco Arena. For those keeping track, yes I did stop going the year before they acquired Chris Webber, Jason Williams, and Vlade Divac and started winning. That’s when I became a Warriors fan. So, I’ve only seen two playoff appearances between the two while I was a fan.

But unless I end up at one of the five remaining homes games after tonight, this is looking like it’ll be my last time watching the Kings up here. It’d be really nice if they could break out the 80s light blue jerseys for me, but I think they’re trying to avoid any jerseys that says Kings or Sacramento on them. I’m curious to see how tonight will go. Though I’d prefer the Kings to stay, I’m hardly a fan of what’s become of them since the Maloofs took over, so in that aspect, I won’t be sad to see them go. It’s just too bad that someone else is going to enjoy Demarcus Cousins in his prime instead of us. Then I’ll know how Seattle fans feel about Kevin Durant.

7 Comments   |  tags: , | posted in Sports

March 16, 2011

Ochocinco Proving My Theory Right!

By chappy81


Back in the beginning of February you may or may not remember my post predicting that between the two lockouts in the NFL and NBA we might see the return of the “two sport athlete”. Low and behold a month and a half after writing that post, Chad Ochocinco decided he wanted to follow his true passion, playing soccer!?! It could just be another one of his publicity stunts, but now that a player is actually going to tryout for a MLS team it might get some of the other NFL players thinking about sports that they were good at growing up. His tryout for the Kansas City MLS team is next week, and will last four days. At the end of the tryout, he will either be joining the team, or be cut. I don’t know a lot about soccer, but Ochocinco sounds like he could be good if he can outrun everyone, but then again, it’s really hard to take him too seriously with anything he does. Here’s a couple of his thoughts on his soccer game;

“I played soccer before football, and I was good. That’s where I get my quick feet, my feet are unbelievable. There’s not one person in soccer right now that would beat me running, that’s including Lionel Messi.” said Ochocinco.

Speaking of the NFL lockout, last night Jimmy Kimmel had his Cousin Sal hit the streets to find out the people’s thoughts on the lockout including a Candian’s point of view. I found it comical enough that it was the perfect video to post after talking about Ochocinco, because some of these questions and answers are as ridiculous as Ochocinco himself!

16 Comments   |  tags: , , , , | posted in Sports

March 15, 2011

NBA Refs Gone Wild

By mceezy

This may or may not be Bill Spooner - who actually knows which ref Bill Spooner is?

 

Minneapolis – An NBA referee has sued the Associated Press and one of its sports writers over a Twitter message suggesting he intentionally made a bad call to make up for a previous bad call that went against the Minnesota Timberwolves.

In a federal lawsuit filed Monday in Minneapolis, veteran NBA referee Bill Spooner claimed AP sports writer Jon Krawcynski defamed him in the Twitter message, sent while he was covering the Jan. 24 Rockets-Timberwolves game.

The Tweet: “Ref Bill Spooner told Rambis he’d ‘get it back’ after a bad call. Then he made an even worse call on the Rockets. That’s NBA officiating folks.”

First off, when did Jim from The Office become a sports writer? The main thing here for me is why is this guy suing over this? I think we already know where I stand on NBA officiating – I made it pretty clear last week. Now they’re denying that the “make-up call” even exists? C’mon, we’ve all accepted it as a suitable way to make up for a previous bad call, but to say you are being defamed and even suing someone for it? The league, of course, found the tweet to be “without substance.”

 

8 Comments   |  tags: | posted in Sports

March 14, 2011

A Life Changing Six Minutes

By chappy81

I’m not sure how many of Japan’s Tsunami/Earthquake video I’ve watched over the last few days, but it’s probably close to the same amount of sports I’ve watched over that same period of time, and that’s saying something. The video above is the best first person video I’ve seen yet. It starts off as a little water coming down the street with some debris, then cars, then freaking buildings as the person filming heads to higher ground. It’s amazing how much life can change in five minutes, and has me wondering when the next big earthquake is going to hit LA. Should I be worried living on the coast? Videos like this make me think I should be a little.

Of course I feel for all the people in Japan, you wouldn’t be human if you didn’t. One of my friends that has most of his family living in Japan, and visits the country yearly summed it up the day after the earthquake best saying “Today felt so weird. To be around so many people who don’t understand, but to be so far away that you don’t understand yourself.”

14 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , | posted in News

March 12, 2011

On the Harrison Barnes Bandwagon

By chappy81

I’ve been watching a ton of college hoops lately trying to gauge teams for my brackets that will most likely be busted by the Sweet 16, since I always over think the picks and switch them to the wrong ones. Last night I even went to the Pac-10 tournament to watch the semi finals. It was my first chance to see Arizona’s Derrick Williams in person, and I have to say, I left Staples Center impressed about his abilities as a pro. Williams was the best player on the court out of the two games. He has all the tools you want in a scorer that thrives on attacking the rim. He made a few nice moves but one on the baseline had him finishing on the opposite side of the rim that he took off from was his biggest highlight. I think that move made me a believer that he truly is pro material based off hang time and body control alone!

Barnes is always cooler than the other side of the pillow.

Anyways, over the last two or three weeks one player stands alone in the must watch category, and that player would be Harrison Barnes. He put on a hell of a performance today going for 40 points and hitting 6 3-pointers against Clemson in an overtime win. He seems to have everything you’d want in a player. Great jumper, can handle the ball, passes when he isn’t open, can finish in traffic, hits his free throws, shoots a high FG%, and also plays some solid defense. At the beginning of the season everyone was ripping Barnes for not living up to the hype of his All-American status. What did he do to change those naysayers opinions? He decided to work hard and get better (isn’t that something you always want from a player?). A lot of guys just like the games, but the good ones like practice just as much, and this guy is addicted to getting better. Very good sign for a 19 year old. I know I thought Evan Turner was going to be a stud in the pros after his solid season at Ohio State last year, but there’s something a lot different this time around as in, I’m sure Barnes will make it, because he’s a different breed. His demeanor never changes whether a call is for or against him, whether he’s made four shots in a row or missed four shots in a row. Short term memory is a gift not a skill. He’s as clutch a player as you’ll find in college hoops right now. When I watch him, I feel like he’s a shorter version of Kevin Durant, and has been more clutch in the hitting game tying or game winning shots to boot. Everyone talks about how this is a weak draft class, but the same was said about the 2009 draft that had Griffin, Curry, Evans, Derozan, Jennings, Lawson, Holiday, and Collison which have all seemed to turn out good so far. Since we have the blog, I figured I may as well state right now that I think Barnes going to be great on the next level, and am crossing my fingers to have him on the Warriors. Cmon W’s start tanking the season, so we can get some more ping pong balls!

16 Comments   |  tags: , , , , | posted in Sports

March 10, 2011

Things I’m Tired Of Hearing About This NBA Season

By mceezy

Anything Heat Related – There might have been one or two Miami Heat squads I actually liked during their entire existence. I can’t name any off the top of my head, but I’d guess that Glen Rice was on the team. To this day, when I think of the Heat, I think of guys like Kevin Edwards, Jon Sundvold, and Rony Seikaly. No matter how much the NBA is trying to shove this Heat team down my throat, I’m not gonna budge. But it’s like Stan Van Gundy said, when you hold the championship celebration in August, the scrutiny will come. I can barely even watch Heat games anymore. If they didn’t have Erick Dampier, they wouldn’t be worth watching at all.

David Stern Still Being David Stern – Seriously, how has this guy not been fired, sued, or bitch-slapped yet?! He’s by far the most arrogant commissioner in the sport with the biggest egos. How is he still in control? (I know, the answer is obvious… money) He has pretty much single-handedly destroyed my favorite sport. I love basketball, but I can barely tolerate the NBA anymore. The officiating has blatantly become just a means of manipulating  the outcome of games. It’s like recess was in elementary school: just as you started breaking a sweat and having fun, some asshole blows a whistle and everyone has to go back in the classroom. Or in this case, stand around and watch one guy shoot a ten foot set shot. Add to that the special treatment various players get no matter how obvious, and it just makes me wanna text Rasheed Wallace and say “look at this sh!t NOW, record hater.” I think I’m even more peeved than usual after reading Stern’s cocky-ass comments about SVG today.

The Spurs – zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Sacramento Kings: Will They or Won’t They? I know… no one outside of Sacramento really has to put up with this news, but there is literally a new story about whether or not the Kings plan to leave town after this season, and more often than not, it’s not even news. For example, today’s biggest story is that fans are trying to sell out the second to last home game of the season, fittingly against the team formerly known as the Seattle SuperSonics. Look, few people spent as much time at Arco Arena as I did growing up (not Power Balance Pavilion, not the Livestrong Center, not the Tiffany Dome, and not the Friendship Bracelet Fieldhouse. Sorry, I’ll stop), but at this point, I feel so alienated by this franchise, I don’t even feel like they’re my home team anymore. This is a city that sold out every game for the first 13 years here, and then after a few down months, the next 7 or 8 again. It’s not the city that’s the problem. I love the movie Major League, but I hate seeing the same strategy being employed in real life. At least the movie had two things the Kings don’t: Charlie Sheen, and duh – winning!

11 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , | posted in Sports

March 10, 2011

Introducing Snowkiting

By chappy81

Since there isn’t a lot going on lately in the sports world, I thought I’d introduce our readers to what some of our friends are doing these days. Growing up, I was torn between snowboarding and skiing living 45 minutes from North Lake Tahoe it was part of life to be at the ski resorts. I settled on snowboarding by the time I hit the double digits or early teens (I can’t really remember). I was never against skiing, but like anything else, you want your sport to rule the mountain. That didn’t stop me from going up the hill to the Sierra’s with my buddies that skied regularly. I actually had a ton of respect for the freestyle skiers that were busting out flips that I could never do. Anyways, one of my buddies that I used to go up the hill with a lot in high school, Tyler Brown, has taken his two planker pride to a new level with snowkiting. I haven’t seen him a whole lot since college or since he got hitched, but it’s good to know he’s still skiing, and now it’s with a parachute or kite. Although I couldn’t find any videos of him, I’m sure the video below is similar to what he’s doing out there. Here’s his website promoting the sport that I’d never really heard of until a buddy told me that he was doing it. If you live near snow and are tired of the same ol hills, maybe this will spice it up for you.

26 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , | posted in Sports

March 7, 2011

Sapporo Commercial

By mceezy

I feel like I’ve seen this before, but I don’t remember being as impressed with it as I am now. Maybe it’s because American beer commercials are either funny or stupid, or both.

3 Comments   |  tags: , | posted in beer

March 4, 2011

Here’s to Hoping For a Lockout!

By chappy81

I can’t say I totally understand what is going on with the NFL and NFLPA duking it out for the $9 billion pot. I know there are plenty of gripes on both sides as there are in any type of labor dispute. All the percentages and retirement funds make my head spin, and honestly I could really care less what ends up happening between the two sides when it’s all said and done. There are two things that I want to see come out of this. The first is that they get a team in Los Angeles. Not because I live here or would go to their games unless I got free tickets, but it makes sense. I’ve never been one that enjoys seeing the rich get richer, but as Charlie Sheen would say you win here you win there, WINNING! Putting a team in LA would be winning for both sides, because it’s a huge market that the players and league would all benefit from. Second, the retired players health. I couldn’t be more on the players side for this one, as the NFL really does need to have some kind of medical plan for the guys that bashed their brains in for the sport that made the owners more rich than they already were. It’s amazing to me how bad they treat their former employees. Almost all of the owners are really old, so you’d think they’d understand these types of problems that come with age. As Simmons points out in his article today, they just love money.

The real reason I wrote this was because I actually want to see this lockout happen. I know I’m in the minority with this view. Apparently today they’ve extended talks for another 7 days, but I don’t see much happening in that week. I’m not saying I would enjoy a fall without football (because I wouldn’t), but if these two sides can’t see that they are winning in nearly every phase, then I hope they lockout. My main reason is I’d love to see them lose some fans. We are the ones that fill their pockets by overspending on game tickets that you can barely even see the field from for $100 each, and while they do give us an amazing product that I thoroughly enjoy, they don’t really care about us, they just want to know how much they can make off us raising prices on everything (tickets, merchandise, parking, concessions, etc) in a national recession. Do they care that we buy licensed NFL products for hundreds of dollars when it cost them one dollar to make in China? No, and I do understand the capitalist point of view on it, but can’t fathom how there’s never enough. Every league is geared for the fans, but I feel like the NFL takes advantage of them a lot more than others, so by all means lockout and lose some of your fans!

That being said if there is a lockout the second football comes back on I’m positive I’ll be watching. I’d love to see a lockout that knocks the NFL down to the #2 or #3 sport in our country in the same way that baseball died after their strike. I’m thinking if it kills a fantasy season that will ultimately take some people away from the game. Would those fantasy players return to being fans of the league without that season? Hopefully not, and I can’t stand being at a bar listening to some guy talk about how his receiver needing 10 yards to take the lead in his matchup. That my friends is something I won’t miss. I can’t say I don’t fall into that trap from time to time, but I know I’d do just fine watching without fantasy sports around. I no longer like the casual fan that doesn’t really root for a team, and I feel like a lockout would kill some of them off. In an era where everything major going on is an open book in the media, I’d love to see them lockout. The league/owners would be crucified in public (rightfully so), and would see a decline in the sports popularity on some level. I wish we could go back to the days when most owners cared more about winning. That’s why I’ll never fault Al Davis for any of the moves he makes no matter how ridiculous they can be. He does them because he thinks it will make them win. You can’t say the same for many teams out there.

 

11 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , , | posted in Sports

March 3, 2011

Charlie Sheen As Darth Vador

By chappy81

This is the best spoof for Charlie I’ve found on youtube.

5 Comments   |  tags: , | posted in Comedy, Random

March 2, 2011

Introducing George Wang

By chappy81

George Wang, in the clip above is a friend of mine, and I recently found out that some of his stuff was on youtube. Instantly I felt the need to get the word out on him through our blog. He’s got tons of funny Asian parent’s stories, so if you ever have the chance to catch him at a live show, you should hit it up! Here’s another good one if you’re interested.

15 Comments   |  tags: , | posted in Comedy

March 1, 2011

Sterling and Sheen

By chappy81

Today, Donald Sterling, released this promo above saying that 1,000 underprivilaged kids and thier parents can go to a game for free in support of Black History Month. Sterling is well known for being racist, heckling his own players, and not caring about anything that doesn’t effect his pocket book. Not sure what you can read into this poster since Black History Month was obviously in February. All kinds of unintentional comedy with this one. The picture is classic, because Sterling has probably one of the whitest black guys out there for the ad. Only reason I say that is because my girlfriend always calls me White instead of Asian… I’d nominate Al-Farouq Aminu, because he descends from a line of Nigerian kings.

Speaking of crazy people that make little to no sense with their actions, Charlie Sheen has made himself into the most quotable guy in recent memory. I’ve always been a fan of Sheen, he had me with the Chase and Major League. I don’t know many people who liked Two and a Half Men, but he’s living the lifestyle that many men wish they could. Yes, he’s got major problems, but his problems don’t seem all that bad when you are constantly winning! I watched him on the Today Show interview and shortly after on his TMZ interview, and thought it would be fun to make a list of my favorite quotes from his wild non-drug enduced tirade.

Drugs and Winning

“I am on a drug, it’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available because if you try it you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.”

“The only thing I’m addicted to right now is winning,” “Just winning every second,” “Winning, anyone?” “Duh, winning!”

“Drug tests don’t lie. Scoreboard doesn’t lie. Duh. Winning.”

On Himself

“Come on, bro, I won best picture at 20. I wasn’t even trying. Wasn’t even warm yet”

“I tried marriage. I’m 0 for 3 with the marriage thing. So, being a ballplayer — I believe in numbers. I’m not going 0 for 4. I’m not wearing a golden sombrero.”

“I’m tired of pretending I’m not special. I’m tired of pretending like I’m not bitching a total fricking rock star from Mars, and people can’t figure me out; they can’t process me. I don’t expect them to. You can’t process me with a normal brain.”

On Rehab aka His House

“We couldn’t really call it rehab because we didn’t have a license to operate one, so it was a crisis management center that we labeled the Sober Valley Lodge. Its primary client achieved radical success.”

“AA was written for normal people. People that don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA, I survived drug addiction because I’m me. I’m different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man.”

That’s a lot of quotes from one man in two days. There were some others, but this was already getting longer than I expected, because every thing he says is pure gold! I wouldn’t mind being on the drug called Charlie Sheen, unless he is right and it does kill you… I’m going to try and incorporate as many of his quotes into my daily life as possible.

18 Comments   |  tags: , , , , , , | posted in Comedy, News, Sports