Category Archives: Random

Second Edition – Top Ten Chuck Norris Jokes:

catchucknorriskick10 ) Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

9 ) Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.

8 ) Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

7 ) When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

6 ) Chuck Norris doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks one pin down and the other nine faint.

chuck-norris-own-country5 ) Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

4 ) Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

3 ) Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay’s potato chip.

2 ) Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

1 ) There is in fact an “I” in Norris, but there is no “team”… not even close.


Don LaFontaine Tribute

It’s been over a year since he passed away, yet I never had the pleasure of coming across this….. UNTIL NOW!

ONE man……. ONE voice……. and a LEGACY that will carry on…… FOREVER.  Academy Award Winner DON LaFONTAINE IS……… The Movie Preview GUY……


First Edition – Top Ten Chuck Norris Jokes:

 (This will be a new weekly series, as long as Chuck Norris allows it…)

Chuck Norris Approved10) If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you. 

9)  Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird. 

8 )  The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

7)  There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

6)  Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

chuck norris toilet paper5)  Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

4)  Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.

3)  Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

2)  Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

1)  There is no ‘ctrl’ button on Chuck Norris’s computer. Chuck Norris is always in control. 


Biggest Snake in the World Found Dead!


Did it make you jump? It made me jump, probably more because I hate snakes!


Here’s your tip: Take some responsibility, Notre Dame

Beautiful campus, ugly lawsuit

Beautiful campus, ugly lawsuit

If you haven’t heard by now, there is a storm a brewing over an accounting mistake pitting David against Goliath.  Take a second, read it through, and tell me you can’t at least see both sides of the argument before settling on your own verdict. If you don’t want to read, here’s a quick recap: Notre Dame University fired, and is now going forward with a lawsuit against, a catering employee over an Accounting error made in the Employees favor.  Not just any old error, mind you, an error costing over $29,000 because of a careless slip of the finger and proofing of someone’s work.  Now it comes down to who’s responsible for what, and Notre Dame is on the offensive.

As the story goes, Sara Gaspar saw this error as it appeared magically (ok, quite unexpectedly) in her account after performing a catering job per her usual duties.  Nothing special about this job whatsoever, most likely deserving of the tip amount Notre Dame claims should have been paid, $29.87.  Instead Ms. Gaspar’s account ballooned by $29,387, and it’s obvious the 3 was punched by an account-type on their 10-stroke keypad instead of the decimal point, located just below the 3.  Ms. Gaspar claims to have called several times to alert the University of the generous error, and eventually she was told there was no mistake by a “supervisor” and they would pass the message along to HR.  Can’t figure out why HR, they don’t make accounting tips under “tips” for work performed, but I guess it was handled more a complaint as she mentioned there was a “problem”.  That was an understatement for sure.  At this point it appears she’s either dumb like a fox or truly thought she would get away with the extra $29,357.13.

ND stays true to form: Looking for a fight!

ND stays true to form: Looking for a fight!

When the University finally realized the error only a month later, Ms. Gaspar informed the University she had none of the money left.   She had already spent the money on medical bills she had recently racked up and a five year old Jetta.  Sensible purchases for someone in her struggling position, but non-sensible logic as to whose money she was spending.  She acted in a hurry, perhaps a little too hastily, but how was she to know it wasn’t her lucky day?  Her thinking was she had finally received a break, the University of Notre Dame was providing a boost to her livelihood the next few months and it wasn’t anywhere near Christmas season yet.  Imagine what they were gonna do then!!

So we arrive at the point where mud is now being slung at Ms. Gaspar by the University in a series of condemning statements and a shiny new lawsuit, asking not only for THEIR error to be reconciled by Ms. Gaspar but for her to cover THEIR attorney’s fees.  Surprisingly I didn’t see anything about interest owed, however, but perhaps they can work that in as well.  GIVE ME A BREAK Notre Dame!!!  Unbelievable!!  At this point one has to think to themselves “How is this even possible??”  Not only has Notre Dame demonstrated their incompetence while suggesting they are are an institution of higher learning, they now decide their only remedy to the situation is to clog the court system with this totally lopsided case.  And by lopsided, I mean a billion dollar institution versus an employee they already fired over this issue, who was living paycheck to paycheck to begin with while taking care of her mother.

Excuse me, TD Jesus, how could you let this happen??

Excuse me, TD Jesus, how could you let this happen??

I’m not familiar with the actual statutes in place for this type of situation, so I’m just taking an educated guess here.  With total disregard to Ms. Gaspar’s failed “attempts” at notifying the University right away, shouldn’t she be in the clear as it was an error made under “Tips” and not under “Wages”?  It appears she has a leg to stand on, but to no one’s surprise she says she is having a hard time finding representation on the case, and it’s obvious that the girth of the University of Notre Dame and it’s team of lawyers is the only reason.  And of course Ms. Gaspar is now suffering from depression and despair over this, can you blame her??

Upon Further Review, the University of Notre Dame should take the loss and allow Ms. Gaspar to keep the money because it was THEIR mistake unfortunately made in an indefensible cost code, Tips.  I think they could make up the missing $30,000 by FIRING their accounting person not for the original error and oversight made but for causing all of this ruckus and dragging the wrongly fired employee in the first place back through this mess.  If they didn’t hire anyone to replace them for 6 months, they would easily replace that loss.  And Notre Dame comes out looking like the bigger person/entity here.  It’s a Win-Win-Win.


RFP of the Day: Lloyd Moseby

Let me first admit I completely stole the idea of the RFP aka Random Forgotten Player of the Day.  Some genius used to run THIS BLOG, but mysteriously stopped posting a little over a year ago.  Not sure why he left off on Danny Tartabull, but I hope he’s okay.  And if you’re reading this, Mr. Originator of the RFP of the Day, I’d really like to know why you stopped.

Anyway, without further ado, I present to you Lloyd Moseby.  It’s no coincidence that I chose Moseby.  Chappy and I went to kindergarten with his daughter.  One day he came to give our class a pep talk, and he was our favorite player for a good portion of the late 80s.  He played 12 seasons from 1980-1991, 10 with Toronto and his final two with Detroit.  He was an all-star in 1986, but his best season came in 1987, when he hit .282 with 26 HR and 96 RBI, along with 39 Stolen Bases.


Why Our Doin Work Blog Is Better Than Yours

Okay okay, so it was apparently a joke, but this clown put up a post with a link to our site simply tagged “shitty website.”  I just wanted to take a second to clear the air.  First off, we did our due dilligence when deciding on a name for the blog.  Yes, we found this dude’s blog, but it looked completely worthless and irrelevant.  I mean, he posts pictures of pancakes and what not.  Moreover, I can understand if sports isn’t your thing and you’re more into breakfast quick breads, but since our name was derived from the critically acclaimed Spike Lee joint, Kobe Doin Work, I think we’re in the clear.   Now, it’s not really our style to call out another blog that has nothing to do with ours, other than we coincidentally chose two of the same words from the English dictionary, but a couple people clicked over to our site from his, so we just wanted to return the favor.


The Return of Benny Lava

Okay, so I guess he never went anywhere, but a friend recently pulled this one out of nowhere.  I hadn’t seen it in probably 6 or 7 years, but it’s timeless!  Needless to say, I’ve watched it no less than 10 times already today.  I even researched the history of “Benny Lava”. Seriously…. who put a goat in there?!?!


Trampoline Basketball

I like these kids.  Just when I thought we were gonna see a bunch of trick shots and dunks, these kids served a changeup!  I love the overuse of editing effects, often times before the shot is even taken!  Add to that the sweet aliases – those can’t be their real names – and the fact that it stars Chunk from The Goonies, and you’ve got an instant classic.  Ok, so it’s not a classic, but it’s a solid minute of entertainment. 


Japanese Fart Dance

Supposedly this little dance number is about farting….


The Classic Firecracker in the Butt

One youtube video led to another, and I ended up on this classic.  I’ll never forget the first time I saw, around 4th of July I believe.  For the first 45 seconds or so, you sit there wondering why you’re even watching it.  But then, like a grand finale, it explodes, literally, before your very eyes into a true fireworks spectacular.


Sorry For the Graphic Nature

However, I didn’t write this, so I feel it’s okay.  I was doing a little “gold mining” on craigslist this morning, but unfortunately, Sacramento doesn’t appear to be that creative.  Even though I don’t live there anymore, I’m probably better off sticking to San Francisco CL.  However, I came across this in the rants and raves, and I’m really not sure what to make of it.  Judge for yourself…

I passed out at a pals and awoke to (his ass bouncing on my)

Date: 2009-08-08, 3:48AM PDT

dick!! I didnt want to cause a confrontation or hurt his feelings, but he kept on for half the night ! Reluctantly I’d spooge into his butt and try to turn over , But He just rolled Me over and sucked it hard and lowered his ass onto it!! probably 5 times!! Finally He quit and I left about an hour later before He awoke and really never went back and have been distant since. Several years have passed and yesterday I see Him driving a Sheriffs car!!! OMG!!!! I wonder if the statue of limitations has expired? Its been 5-6 years now!



Umm, what??  I have so many questions.  Most are simply, “what??”  But I’m also curious as to whether this is real or fake, whether it’s actually a rant or a rave, why it sounds like a female (perhaps just the OMG) when that is biologically impossible, or what the perpetrator being a sheriff has to do with anything.  And yes, poster, I believe the statute of limitations has run up.  If it hasn’t, this post might diminish your argument here.  I mean, I don’t think “spooging into his butt and trying to turn over” is what rape victims do in self-defense.  I don’t know, I’m probably thinking about it too hard, but I must admit, this was quite the thought-provoking anecdote.


Mullet City!

A Picture Says a Thousand Words

A Picture Says a Thousand Words


Shaq-Fu

I don’t think I’ve seen this video or heard this song in at least 15 years.  I’m okay with that too. 


I Accidentally Won $1.65 Mil On a Nickel Slot On the Way to Work

 

This is obviously a stock photo, for its doubtful the woman was young, hot, and Asian.

This is obviously a stock photo, for it's doubtful the woman was young, hot, and Asian.

Courtesy of the Sacramento Bee….

An Auburn woman’s favorite slots at Thunder Valley Casino in Lincoln are a set of Wizard of Oz nickel machines. So, Susan Nott, a federal employee, decided to stop by the casino 30 miles east of Sacramento on Tuesday morning to give them another try.

After playing a five-cent machine for about 30 minutes she hit it big — winning $1,648,076.81.

Nott said she would spend her winnings to buy a car, pay off her children’s student loans and invest.

Can you imagine that call in to work? “Hey boss, I’m, uh, not gonna make it in this morning.  Actually, I might not make it in for a couple weeks.  I just won $1.65 million this morning, so um, yeah.  Hope that’s not a problem.  I mean, if it is, then I quit, but you know, I’ll, uh, come back sooner or later otherwise.”

Sure is a lot better than the guy who racked up a $29,000 tab at a Las Vegas strip club while blacked out!