I really didn’t wanna write about this…. It dominated my NBA Playoff-filled Sunday though. So much so that I had to try it today. I was about to orate my observations from the opening round of the postseason, but then I saw it again. The second my fingers hit the keyboard, it came on. Like a rainstorm right after a carwash, I got hit with the KFC Double Down Sandwich commercial. If you watched just one quarter of NBA basketball this weekend, you saw it twice. You hear a couple guys with helium voices talking about chicken. All of a sudden, it’s unleashed. The heralded chicken sandwich that’s too big for a bun, and we’re not talking Tortadas. It takes three or four repetitions before a commercial gets across to me. By the ninth or tenth time, I’m annoyed to the point where I don’t want to try your product simply out of spite. By the 16th time, however, you’ve beaten this thing so deep into my brain, I’m not only gonna try your product, I’m gonna try it fully expecting it to be less than amazing. I know you know what I’m talking about now.
So today I did it. When lunchtime came calling, I doubled down on that ass. I hit up the local KFCizzle on Bradshaw (which for the record sucks) and was immediately hit with a sign announcing the Double Down Combo for $6.99! I knew the DD was going to be small, but with all the value menu fanfare that’s abuzz right now, I was disappointed to see it cost $5 for the “sandwich” by itself.Ultimately, the double down was just like I expected it would be. We know the end of the sandwich they show in the commercials looks good, but we also know chicken breasts are pointy on the other end. How’s that gonna work out? As you would expect, it doesn’t. The reality is you simply can’t make sandwich casings out of chicken. You’ve got cheese hanging out one side, three-quarters of it is chicken-on-chicken, and that one piece of bacon pulls out with your first bite. So predictable. I will concede that there were one or three bites that were heavenly, and for that it may very well have been worth $5 and one meal of my life. And if that other breast were a sandwich like I had expected I might have been okay. But the true glory of this endeavor was to be able to proceed hating the commercial, and the item it endorses, with reason. I can say I doubled down, but it just wasn’t worth it in the end. I’m better off just playing two hands.